Saturday, December 15, 2012

“My wife instantaneously phased home and left me by a broken down car in the middle of nowhere.”

(Excerpt of Sororate Chapter Two)


I stayed up until dawn because I knew if I went to bed, I wouldn’t be able to get any sleep.  So I busied myself by doing laundry and cleaning out my backpack before storing it away in the attic.

For comfort food, I cracked open a jar of Nutella.  I curled up on the couch, spooning out the delicious chocolate hazelnut spread as I ate it straight.  Heart-aching moments like these made it a bitch not being able to drink alcohol so over the years I found replacements; like eating or hot scented bubble baths or loud music to temporarily deafen my sorrows. 

Tonight called for all three.  After I ate the whole jar of Nutella, I turned the music up even louder then I headed upstairs for the hot scented bubble bath.

By 4 AM as the sun came up, I finally felt tired enough to go to bed. Sleeping in daylight has never bothered me since hunting the night of a full moon, it was the custom for the tribe’s Werewolves to sleep in late.  When my eyes opened again, Declan’s digital clock read as 11.34 AM.

I didn’t bother to brush my hair after putting on some old ‘around the house’ clothes.  Instead, I traipsed downstairs and into the kitchen to make some scrambled eggs on toast.  Once the dirty dishes were stowed inside the dishwasher, I set up shop at the coffee table in the lounge room.  I turned on my laptop as I began to organize my next presentation on the topic of, ‘Female Deities in Ancient Mythology: Early Expectations On Women’. 

At 4 PM as I was writing up the section on ‘Goddesses of Fertility’, suddenly my front door swung open with the appearance of my husband.

I was sitting calmly on a cushion on the floor with my un-brushed hair, doing work.  Declan stormed into the lounge area and glared my way in fury.  I could tell he was expecting an apology or something with his demanding eyes, but I ignored him by returning to work. 

He dropped his backpack loudly onto the wooden floor as he stood over my position.  Still I ignored him, as I picked up my glass of root beer and drank from it.  Then casually, I continued typing up comparisons between Demeter, Isis and the Virgin Mary.

“Hi Declan, you’re home early from your six week holiday aren’t you?”  He cried out sarcastically as he began to have a two-way conversation with himself.  “Yeah, I was left stranded in China.  Oh really, why was that?  My wife instantaneously phased home and left me by a broken down car in the middle of nowhere.  Declan, that’s terrible!  Tell me about it!  I had to wait an hour by myself until the mechanic in his repair vehicle appeared and then I had to help him replace ALL of the frickin’ tyres when his motorized jack broke!  Then I had to drive to Leshan instead of to Yushu which was another long drive so I could catch the first available flight to Juneau.  From Juneau, I flew to Fairbanks, where I had to get another frickin’ rental car.  I RUSHED here so I wouldn’t be away from my mate for 24 hours, who ABANDONED me in a frickin’ foreign country!” 

I didn’t look up nor did I pause with my typing.  The enraged European Werewolf turned around to stalk upstairs.  I listened to him go into our bedroom when I overheard further furious snarling.  Then he stomped back down the staircase whilst holding up my mobile phone which was still switched off.

“B, I would like to introduce you to the 23rd Century mobile phone.  It was advertised when we bought it, ‘that the self-recharging battery in this model of phone means that you never run out of power and with our world-wide coverage, you’re never out of range’.”  He continued sarcastically.  “Now let’s just get this clear so we’re both on the same page here; you’re supposed to leave your phone switched on let alone on you at all times, so you don’t give your husband a frickin’ heart attack when he tries to call you over thirty times after you ABANDONED in a frickin’ foreign country!”

I closed my eyes as I inhaled and exhaled loudly, whilst trying to keep my cool.

He continued to rant; “And it’s nice to see you sulking with your bed-hair showing that you at least got some sleep in the last twelve hours as for me, it’s been two days since I slept a wink!  If I’m not staying up all night in our hotel keeping watch in case we’re attacked by Asian Werewolves; it’s me being ABANDONED in a frickin’ foreign country!”

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